We are just months away from my baby's 4th Birthday. She reminded me yesterday, when she wanted to play scrabble, and I told her it was for big girls. She said, "Mommy, I am a four year old you know." Sorry hun, not yet, and I'm sort of dreading it, to be honest. I just wish that I could keep her little forever.
The other day we were watching a show where the kids moved out and went to college. She came up to me crying because she said she never wants to move away and go to college. She wants to stay close to mommy forever.....
She's starting 5 day preschool next year. It's only a few hours a day, but it's getting real to me that she will not be my little baby forever. She'll be starting school in couple of years, making new friends, and if she has listened to her dad, she'll be staying FAR away from boys :)
School for us means that I have to leave my comfort zone of Creative Beginnings Preschool. Callie has been there since she was a baby. (I worked there, she went to daycare there, and now I don't work there but she goes there for part time preschool). I know all of the teachers. They all know Callie. I feel like everyone looks out for each other there. It's a little family really. When she goes to big girl school, she'll ride the bus, she'll have new teachers that I don't know, make new friends that I don't know. At some point I know you have to let go and trust that everyone has your child's best interest at heart. And pray and pray that that's the case.
My hopes for Callie as she grows up are probably pretty much the same as every one's. I want her to respect herself, her teachers, and her friends. I want her to be nice, but still be able to stick up for herself. I want her to know that she can do anything she sets her mind to. This is not just a saying, I know she can. I want her to know that her mommy and daddy will always be here to love and guide her, no matter what choices she makes. I pray that she makes mostly good ones, scattered with some bad ones, so she learns that failure happens. I don't want her to grow up thinking the world owes her anything or that she will always be on top. I want her to know that I will love her through her biggest failure in life, whatever that may be. And I want her to learn that a failure is just a millisecond in her life. There are bigger, better moments and to hold on for those. I want her to know and love God. I want her faith to lead her through the best and worst of times. I want her to be passionate about life, know that she has the freedom to express herself. I want her to be thankful for the freedoms she has. I want her to be a giver, not a taker. I want her to stand up for what's right, even if she's standing alone....
Not asking much, right? :) But I know in my heart that it's up to me to instill these things in her heart, mind, and spirit. I pray everyday that I don't fail her...
She is so lucky to have this "village" of people who love her and protect her. And anyone who shows your child love, you should be so grateful to. And I am.
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